2 Honest Whore – Act 5, Scene 1

Return to previous scene

 Enter at one door HIPPOLITO; at another, LODOVICO,
ASTOLFO, CAROLO, BERALDO, and FONTINELL.

 LODOVICO
Yonder’s the lord Hippolito’s.  By any means leave him and me together.  Now will I turn him into a madman.

 OMNES
Save you, my lord.    [Exeunt ASTOLFO, CAROLO, BERALDO, and FONTINELL.

 LODOVICO
I ha’ strange news to tell you.

HIPPOLITO
What are they?

LODOVICO
Your mare’s in the pound.

HIPPOLITO
How’s this?

LODOVICO
Your nightingale is in a limebush.

HIPPOLITO
Ha?

LODOVICO
Your puritanical honest whore sits in a blue gown.

HIPPOLITO
Blue gown!

LODOVICO
She’ll chalk out your way to her now.  She beats chalk.

HIPPOLITO
Where?  Who dares?

LODOVICO
Do you know the brick-house of castigation by the river side that runs by Milan?  The school where they pronounce no letter well but O?

HIPPOLITO
I know it not.

LODOVICO
Any man that has borne office of constable, or any woman that has fall’n from a horse-load to a cart-load, or like an old hen that has had none but rotten eggs in her nest, can direct you to her.  There you shall see your punk amongst her back-friends, there you may have her at your will, for there she beats chalk, or grinds in the mill, with a whip deedle, deedle, deedle, deedle.  Ah, little monkey!

HIPPOLITO
What rogue durst serve that warrant, knowing I loved her?

LODOVICO
Some worshipful rascal, I lay my life.

HIPPOLITO
I’ll beat the lodgings down about their ears
That are her keepers.

LODOVICO
So may you bring an old house over her head.

HIPPOLITO
I’ll to her,
I’ll to her, stood armed fiends to guard the doors                              [Exit.

LODOVICO
Oh me!  What monsters are men made by whores?
If this false fire do kindle him, there’s one faggot more to the bonfire.  Now to my Bridewell birds.  What song will they sing?                               [Exit.

Proceed to the next scene

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